Getting ‘squatchy

That’s right, people.
That there is Bigfoot.
On my very own kitchen floor!

Now, when I began this blog (a whole 5 days ago), I decided I would not, ever, put photos of my family on. I am, by nature, very paranoid and do not trust internet security. And I’m not making any exceptions here because CLEARLY this is NOT my 7 year old son. As you can plainly see, it’s Bigfoot.

What is Bigfoot doing on my kitchen floor? Oh. I’m so glad you asked!

He is having the mother of all shit fits.

Bigfoot is unhappy because we aren’t having a costume party. It’s Tuesday night dinner and Bigfoot has posted a sign, specifically requesting a costume party, but his damn parents won’t humor him. Not because they don’t like playing dress up but because they just did this the previous night. Oh, and the night before that too.

Parenting can be challenging.
(What an understatement, right?!?!?)
Especially if you have ADD/ADHD or have a child that does.
Even more so if you AND your child both have ADD/ADHD!!!!

But, you know what would make parenting a lot easier? Personally, it would help me out a lot if my son were dressed up as Bigfoot whenever he has a meltdown. Because, rather than being annoyed and frustrated, my husband and I were laughing our assess off! Now, I’m not advocating laughing at your dear children when they’re upset. I tried not to. Really, I did!!! But, YOU try keeping a straight face when your beloved child, dressed head to toe in brown fuzz, is rolling around making wookie noises on the floor! Hilarious.

Temper tantrums are annoying and challenging for any parent to deal with. For me, having ADD makes it very difficult to handle certain annoyances in an appropriate way. Like many people with ADD/ADHD, my mouth often moves faster than my brain. And I’m not just “not thinking” or being careless with my words, thank you very much!

Here’s the deal:

ADD/ADHD affects the frontal lobe of the brain. Our frontal lobe plays a strong role in our emotional regulation and is responsible for controlling impulses,organization, motivation and “sequential memory.”

So, thanks to my dysfunctional frontal lobe, I often lack the impulse control to sensor my words and actions. In other words, I blurt out things that are better left unsaid. For example, the other day I got freaked out when my husband was driving and I yelled, “FUCK A DUCK!!!” (my most favorite swear word phrase) with my kids in the car. Oops.

Anyways, tantrums can be very challenging for me to deal with. I spent a lot of time thinking about why they are so hard. When my son has a melt down, I feel very out of control. I DON’T like feeling this way. It makes me feel anxious and stressed. This kicks in my ADD and causes me to overreact (lack of emotional regulation…thanks again, frontal lobe!). When Bigfoot threw his shit fit on our floor, my husband and I chose laughter. And what happened?!? It stopped the tantrum in it’s tracks! Go figure! We all started laughing and no one got stressed or upset. We moved on. If only this could happen more often!

What have I learned from this?
Making my son wear his Bigfoot costume around all the time isn’t practical (it sheds everywhere!). Laughing, or at least smiling, when faced with a challenging situation will help me feel more in control of my emotions. And when I’m in control of my own emotions, I am more capable of helping my child regain control.

I accept the fact that this won’t always work. I will most likely NOT smile when faced with certain shit fits. You know the ones–they occur early in the morning, when you haven’t gotten enough sleep, before your coffee and are over things like “I CANT FIND MY BLUE SOCKS!!!!”…and you’re running late. You know what I mean.

But, here’s the thing. I’m trying my best. So, tonight I will be attending our impromptu costume party dinner dressed as a pirate. Again.